Saturday, September 05, 2020

Stop Fighting And Start...

COVID-19 has come for our plans and left us overextended in lots of ways. This is an emotionally and financially exhausting time to be living through. One of the most difficult things about this moment is having clear conversations about topics we never really had to talk about before.

Whether it's canceling plans with your closest friend because their pod is bigger than yours or questioning a family member who isn't wearing a mask, these conversations can get really heated, really fast.

But as with so many things in 2020, the only way out is through. That's why I spoke with Kwame Christian, an expert in negotiation and conflict resolution, about how we can have these tough conversations without letting them boil over into full-blown arguments.

Christian's technique centers on a simple, three-step process that goes like this:
  • Acknowledge and validate the emotion. Recognize how everybody is feeling about the situation, even if it's difficult.
  • Get curious with compassion. Ask lots of questions and genuinely listen to the answers. 
  • Joint problem-solving. Once both parties have acknowledged how they're feeling and identified why there's an issue, come up with solutions together — so that there is buy-in from both sides.  
Continue....

-- Sylvie Douglis